I was so drunk once I sat under a beer pong table talking to a dog while every one kept partying.
Once I was so drunk that a tiny red bike with one peddle caught my eye while walking with my friend through the park. Me being highly intoxicated thought it would be an amusing idea to jump on. I had Asda security chasing me in and out the doors on my tiny bike while shouting ‘you will never get this, la la la la la’ falling off numerous times.
Once my friend was so drunk she came home after a night out and decided to take all the flowers and plant pots from her neighbors garden. She awoke with mud on her face and plants all around her bedroom.
When I was at my best friends graduation party, we decided to start drinking. I got so drunk that I got 5 girls to make out with me, then after that I went in the hot-tub completely nude. I stayed nude for the rest of the night and played beer pong until I puked all over my best friend! Eventually I woke up downstairs in the basement with my ex-girlfriend. Don’t remember anything past making out with the second girl. All on video. pretty much.
Once got so drunk, I woke up in a middle of a desert next to my bro. I was shocked and scared but also very drunk. I walked up to the edge of the hill that we were on… Screamed YOLO and jumped those 5 meters. My bro got up soon after I jumped, he was on the phone telling someone that I was dead. Well I wish I was! Still have no clue how I woke up on that rock in the middle of nowhere far away from home. Nor me or my bro remember anything including how we came back home. I know he is hiding something…
I was so drunk last night that I left a party I was throwing at my house when my parents showed up out of nowhere. I started claiming they were undercover cops and called friends to come pick me up because my parents were about to arrest me. I threw my phone and keys because I thought they were tracking me (still have not found my keys) and finally woke up the next morning in a ditch about 1 and a half miles from home.
I was so drunk last night. Turned 19 I gave a party invited like 20 lads. We had 110 liters of beer and a shitload of Vodka etc. Slammed loads of these and shotted some vodka and then we went to the pub. Shotted some more Jager and the next thing that i remember is waking up on the middle of the road in a parking plot, total blackout. My friends told me that we went to the snack bar to get ourselves some doner kebab and it was full of People and we all got kicked out for being way too drunk. Last thing they remember is me walking away and not coming back.
I got so drunk at my friends party that I started to cry because a week before I told my friend I was going to stay sober. I fell asleep on the kitchen sink and spilled my water on my jeans so I was about to take them off but my friend stop me. Later on, we smoked pot in a park and we decided to go to Tim horton where I fell asleep on the table and I almost got hit by a car. That night was terrible.
I was so drunk I was waiting at a bus stop and needed to pooh. I decided to drop my trousers and do it, but with no toilet paper i grabbed a leaf. I was pushing one out when the bus arrived. The driver stopped, and i was squatting with half a shit hanging out, at the moment he shook his head at me, i opened my mouth to protest, but all that came out was vomit, he left. To summarize, vomited whilst squatting and shitting, bus driver refused to take me.
Got so drunk I blacked out. In the time I was out I apparently (according to my friends) ran laps around campus screaming breaking bad lines, endlessly recited shakespeare in an attempt to try and prove I was sober enough for more alcohol, tried to pick a fight with the burly 300 pound football player for “looking like a baboon”, started claiming I was an agent for the CIA, puked everywhere, stripped to my underwear, ripped the paper towel dispenser off the wall and fell asleep on the bathroom floor.
I was so drunk I slipped and crashed into the band’s singer and knocked him out.
I was so drunk last weekend and drank way to much fireball that I took my shirt off in front of a group of guys and gals multiple times and I still can’t recall doing so.
I was so drunk on my friend’s wedding day that I crawled into church during the ceremony. It was recorded on his wedding DVD.
My friend was so drunk he wanted to see if he could fly. So he jumped off the third floor balcony… He can’t fly. He’s gonna try to pick up girls in a body brace for the next 6-12 months.
I was so drunk one time that I got completely naked at my buddies cinco de mayo party and talked to his neighbor who was cutting his grass.
One time I was so drunk that I ran on the main road in my swim suit to my house 3 blocks away.
I was once so drunk that I watched an entire 5 minute add on Youtube while I thought I was watching the video.
I was so drunk that I don’t find out she(he) had a dick until we were both naked in my bed.
One time at my friends birthday I got so drunk I blacked out and woke up in a closed hair salon with the owner and myself sleeping on the couch of the waiting area.
My friend Carter was so drunk he started stripping on the table at the party and girls were putting dollar bills down his pants and when he woke up he thought the money was from the tooth fairy and that all his teeth had fallen out so he started crying.