I was so drunk last night that I puked everywhere in front of my mom and my future boss.
Stories in: Miscellaneous
I was so drunk that I tried to type the full story but it exceeded the 600 character limit. Long story short, me and my wingman got plastered at a ratchet bar, got ripped off by a gap toothed hooker while the police dragged me from the wrong motel room to mine, only to contemplate the origin on period blood on the bed and the locations of our missing wallets. Went to work 2 hours later and spent the day half drunk and strung out on caffeine pills, only to drown our sorrows at the same bar and hire another hooker.
Once I got so drunk at my best fiends ex’s birthday party I pissed on the neighbors state cop car.
I was so drunk yesterday night at a music festival that this guy came up to me and asked if I’d like to join his freestyle dancing group. All I did was try to get from the stage to the bar.
Once I was so drunk that a tiny red bike with one peddle caught my eye while walking with my friend through the park. Me being highly intoxicated thought it would be an amusing idea to jump on. I had Asda security chasing me in and out the doors on my tiny bike while shouting ‘you will never get this, la la la la la’ falling off numerous times.
Once got so drunk, I woke up in a middle of a desert next to my bro. I was shocked and scared but also very drunk. I walked up to the edge of the hill that we were on… Screamed YOLO and jumped those 5 meters. My bro got up soon after I jumped, he was on the phone telling someone that I was dead. Well I wish I was! Still have no clue how I woke up on that rock in the middle of nowhere far away from home. Nor me or my bro remember anything including how we came back home. I know he is hiding something…
One time I was so drunk that I ran on the main road in my swim suit to my house 3 blocks away.
I was once so drunk that I watched an entire 5 minute add on Youtube while I thought I was watching the video.
I was so drunk once, I stumbles onto this website to find something entertaining, I read a whole page before I realized I was on the wrong website.
I was so drunk one night that i took my little sis out mudding with me and my guy friends and almost had a threesome in the backseat while she was in the passenger seat.
My sis and I were so drunk, she chased me for an hour and the only reason we went home is because I fell and almost broke my ankle.
I was so drunk once that I fell off of the toilet and fell asleep butt naked.
I was so drunk once, I pooped on a restaurant table on my way home.
I was so drunk that I once smart-mouthed a cop who was writing me a fix-it ticket and wound up with a DUI.
I was so drunk once that I urinated in a fountain and fell in it.
I was so drunk once that I put a feather in my ass and I thought I could fly.
I was so drunk once that I put my glasses in the fridge. I couldn’t find them for one week.
I was so drunk that I ran outside in my bra. All my neighbors saw me half naked.
I was so drunk once that I pooped in a urinal.
I was so drunk once I brought road signs home and put them in my bedroom.