1611 Posted by DrunkJesus in Miscellaneous.


While at a party with some of my friends, I drank three beers, an entire bottle of wine, and an unknown quantity of vodka.  I was so drunk by the end of the night that I apparently starting introducing myself to everyone as “Drunk Jesus” and explained to my best friend that I was really great at cunnilingus.

I woke up the next morning on the floor of my apartment having taken a taxi home, and was informed by my roommate that when he tried to wake me a few hours, I had declared that I was asserting my dominance over the floor and that he needed to leave.

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