One time I was so drunk that I went to work and changed my employees year-end bonus’s based on how I actually felt about them.
I was so drunk in a party that on our way home at the backsit I planned to touch the chicks leg glowing in the dark, I did! But only to find out that it’s my own leg I’m caressing. Sobeer!
I was so drunk one night that I got home too early.
I was so drunk at a pool party that I shat in the pool and kept swimming in it.
It was my best friends birthday party. I was drunk and hungry so I ate pizza and fell asleep with pizza in my mouth. I woke up 3 hours later (still drunk as f***) and swallowed the rest of the pizza in my mouth…
One I night I had gotten so drunk at my now ex girlfriends house that I decided to dance on the roof of my lifted truck and fell off, unfortunately the night did not end there.. after some more drinking her brother in law and i decided to go across the highway from her house to smoke some weed on our way back I stated I had to piss and proceeded to pull it out and begin urinating in the highway with a 18 wheeler coming head on. I had no memory of this the next morning until I saw the pictures and videos.
Alright so, I was at my friends house and brought my other friend. We were smoking weed so we were all high and my friend was going crazy cause it was her first time. My friends parents were out so we decided to be little shits and steal their alcohol, after that all I remember is taking shots, and eating crackers. When I woke up, I wasn’t wearing a bra or panties and I was in a different shirt. My friend told me that I puked everywhere and walked around the house bottomless in front of her parents… I was so embarrassed.
One time me and my bud were so drunk walking home we came across a steam roller on some roadworks. We both then tried to drive the steam roller but my friend fell off and cracked his head on the wheel thing. We did walk back to his house but we eventually called an ambulance as he hadn’t stopped bleeding.
Went to a uni party being thrown by the maths department at the uni for some of the students and lecturers. Wasn’t even intending to drink. Basically drank so much so quickly that I got blackout drunk puked everywhere. Embarrassed myself in front of everyone and woke up on a strangers sofa with no recollection of the night.
One time, after a long day of tailgating for a football game, I was completely hammered and decided to go out yet again with some friends. At this point, I got to the party and the people there tried to give me water. I kept refusing and told them the only way I would drink the water was if I could pour vodka in it. Finally, they gave up and gave me the water and some alcohol. That was the first and last time I make a mixed drink with water and cheap vodka. So Drunk
Went to a party with my group of friends. First mistake: taking a shot of vodka with almost every person at the party. After being there not even an hour, my friend and I were completely hammered. I lost my cell phone, and I went and sat in their bathtub and my friend crawled into one of their closets and laid in there. After this point, I don’t remember what happened the rest of the night. All I know is, the next morning I woke up extremely confused and still drunk on my friend’s kitchen floor with leaves in my hair.
I was at a party and drank some blue drink from some random girl told me to drink. My friend told me not too but I did anyways. Tried to knock out a pole when I thought it was my friend. Then blacked out and woke up in centerfield in the softball field.
Once my dad got so drunk at a New Year’s party that he threw up on his jeans and tried to clean it off in the bathtub with his phone still in his jeans pocket
I was at a house party with friends and whilst trying not to have a breakdown because the bathroom lock wasn’t working (it wasn’t my house, I don’t know why I cared), the host took all the boys to his mum’s room where they played with her dildos. The only other thing I remember that night is being serenaded with a guitar by a guy and my best friend singing Taylor Swift whilst a different guy gave me a massage.
I got so drunk that I was convinced I was a mermaid and tried to jump into a river. Then I walked around for 20 minutes yelling my name until one of my friends saw me and took me away but I still wanted to party so I took a shot (I still have no clue what was in it) and then proceeded to try and do gymnastics. Then I hooked up with a drug dealer.
My friend was so drunk that I had to leave him home while me and the guys go out, 1 am I’m getting text messages from my 11 year old brother that my friend locked himself in the bathroom and won’t come out and that he heard glass breaking, so I come home and get the door open he broke my toilet and shower glass door.
After coming home so drunk from my friends party I crawled up exactly 25 stairs into my living room got up and slipped on the kitchen tiles hitting my head and woke my dad up. He laughed and took me to the bathroom and kept laughing as I was throwing up. #FatherOfTheYear
One friend and I were about 10 shots in after about 3 hours. A different friend came over so we kept drinking with him. After a morning recap, apparently we were so drunk we went to a party and i kept touching a girls ass and she said if I did it again she’d punch me in the face. it explained my hurting lip. My friend threw up all over the other friend. Also, we skyped a female friend of mine and did/said something which included her seeing my friend’s ass. She has me blocked on facebook now. Also, I stole about $60 in alcohol a half gallon of Jameson and some hard ciders.
1) Drank vodka, jager, triple sec, no chaser or water.
2) Someone fell on me in bar bathroom, broke my wrist
3) my friends lost me only to find me chewing ice cubs under the table
4) went back to hotel, slept in elevator and crawled to room
5) we lost one of our drunk friends (apparently left him in bar)
6) drunk called my mom
Was at a new years eve party, and we all went to see the fireworks on our towns bridge. When it turned midnight I gave my friend a hug in celebration. What I did not know is that he had a sparkler in his hand, which proceeded to light my jacket on fire. I was so drunk it took me a good 5 minutes to get it out. To celebrate me getting the fire out, I took a shot of Vodka, but was so drunk that I hit myself in the face with the bottle breaking my tooth.